I lay there in a pool of blood
the pain was finally gone
Each quick beat of my heart
pushing further away.
My fingers slowly curled
through no will of my own.
They seem to reach for something
And find only nothingness.
I no longer feel my body
I'm free of its trap
I can still feel my heart beat
But its fading rather fast.
Slowly I try to close my eyes
and take away the view
I no longer have control
So on I stare against the light
Quiet is closing in now
and I never shed a tear
My heart is no longer beating
sadly I finally realize
just what I really did
no longer am I whole now
no longer cause I'm dead
I will not wake
I was asked to dance by a gentleman
A stranger I did not know
His grip on me was strong and true
His steps were firm and brave.
He spun me round and twirled me so
I thought we were having fun
then in my horror I realized fast
just what I had begun.
"Dance with me" the stranger said
And I could not resist
His eyes had been the deepest blue
His hair the dark of night
His touch was that of an icy wind
that slips quiet down your back
He had flashed me a handsome smile
I saw no need to fear
And I in my willing thoughts
had slipped from out my chair.
And now my stranger held me tight
And spun me round once more
I watched my li
Black
as thick as ink
the water lapping at the edge
in and out
in and out
I felt the ground
slipping from
under me
the world melting away
and I was being pulled in
off in the distance
searching for light
where I knew there was none
water and sky
unbroken
I long to touch it
to feel the velvety smoothness
the water touching me
cold,
shocked,
cool
I wanted more
forward
cold over me
wading
inky dark spread before me
surrounding me
wet and cool
A year ago today
I learned a lesson I never wanted to know.
A year ago today
I heard words I never though you'd say.
A year ago today
I told you that I loved you, you said you had been wrong.
A year ago today
I learned that some monsters are very real.
A year ago today
I held your hand and watched you fade away.
A year ago today
I learned the real meaning of good-bye.
A year ago today
I learned what it means to cry.
A year ago today
I saw the spring that was just a week away.
A year ago today
I realized what it meant to be wrong.
A year ago today
I learned what it means to go on.
I miss you most when
you're not here,
and your presence
is all I feel.
I miss you most when
there's things to share
and you're not here
to show you care.
I miss you most when
things are tough
and memories
just aren't enough.
I miss you most when
skies are blue
and all I feel
is dark and gloom.
I miss you most when
I hear that song
and have to know
that now you're gone.
Some days I miss you
I wish that you'd come home.
Some days I hate you
for leaving us alone.
Some days I think of you
and the things you use to do.
Some days I dream of you
I've learned to forget somehow.
Some days I talk to you
though I know that you don't hear.
Some days I cry for you
and the things you'll never do.
Some days I forgive you
for all the many mistakes.
Some days I don't blame you
for the past I can't erase.
Some days I still hear you
the many things you'd say.
Some days I can still feel you
you're presence ever real.
Some days I remember you
I know you once were real.
Some days I miss you
I wish y
It's time to say goodbye,
Pack your toys,
And box your games,
It's time to grow up now.
Can't stay little
Can't stay young
You're a big girl now;
So say good bye to
Childhood's dreams
The years pass,
And you forgot
All your childhood
Hopes and fears
But now you're grown
And now you're big
It's time to say goodbye again
Pack your clothes
And box your stuff
It's time to move on
You're not little
You're not young
Become your own person
Say goodbye to
Childhood memories
It won't be long
my final song.
Shadows dance
or maybe prance.
The quiet stirs
the night infers.
All is gone
the dark so long.
My broken path
this aftermath.
The shameful waste
of midnight's haste.
I remember that winter
when He came to visit me.
I told Him I'm not ready
I do not want to go.
He shook His ghastly head
and flashed His wicked smile.
He had not chosen me
for it wasn't my time at all.
Instead He'd chose another
someone great and tall.
I watch that guest do His magic
all those cold winter days.
We prayed for a savor
that he just might see the spring.
But our visitor had other plans
and decided he should go.
We begged him not to leave us
how it would hurt us so.
he didn't want to leave us
but he knew he had to go.
Our visitor stood waiting
we said our last goodbyes.
That visitor sea
I want to wake up.
yet something holds me here
Was I dreaming again?
Or was this real,
I can't tell.
I try screaming
but I hear no sound.
Why can't I scream?
A sound -my alarm-
But I still cant wake up
-Silence-
Its gone quiet,
my head is spinning
I'm suffocating
(Pull the covers down)
I'm awake, but my mind is gone
-Roll over-
pull the covers back up
Dark - Quiet -
somewhere far away
I feel something
-Touch-
Must wake up
(no afraid)
Can't clear my mind
-echoes-
Where am I?
(-dream-)
Awake?
No, its dark, no light
-cold-
(Very cold)
Wake up!
Free me!
Let me go!
-panic-
I try to run
-Falling-
Dark engulf
Current Residence: South Michigan Favourite genre of music: Varies, Operating System: q_os Personal Quote: Maybe tonight I'll live forever, Maybe tomorrow I won't.
Favourite Visual Artist
Dali,Leighton,Van Gogh,Waterhouse
Favourite Movies
Labyrinth
Favourite Bands / Musical Artists
Right now.. The Tea Party,Our Lady Peace
Favourite Writers
Lewis Carroll/Christina Rossetti
Favourite Games
Clue or Monopoly
Favourite Gaming Platform
The Table
Tools of the Trade
Camera.. my hands.. my eyes..crayons.. paint.. anything else I can find..
Well It seems forever since I was last on here.. which is cause it has been that long. Im sorry to those of you that check on me in any sort of regular basis cause I am just never around to post things. Yes I have current things I have been working on (or at least more current then anything posted here) but I have found that work takes up more of my time then I would like for it to have. Maybe thats something I need to set a few moments away for. Who knows its a new year and stranger things have been known to happen..
So I was asked today if I was still doing anything in the art world because I havent posted anything in so long. Well yes I am still taking pictures and still drawing, My paintings are waiting for me to get that ever missing moment of freetime. but otherwise all is going alright.
Its not that I dont love all of you cause if you know me.. you know I do.. and I miss you too, but alas it seems that while I find time to take the pictures I find little time to post them. I do drop by and look at things and always plan to post. (good intentions are better then no intentions right??) So I did take the time to post a few things. sorry they werent c
so I didnt drop of the planet so completely it only looks that way.. you know how it goes graduate school and it seems everyone thinks you should actually work for a living which would be cool if they would pay you for doing nothing but btw they dont. as grandma says what you gonna do.. well seems i work
Thanx for the comment! I miss you! I don't see you online here much anymore. Comeback!!! Oh, and if you haven't heard, Trisha and JP are getting married!
(and of course so is Uria....man, something must be in the water!)